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Feedback provides a powerful basis for improving skills and gives new insight. Strive to always be the best you possible.
Take a leap to the end of your life right now. Difficult situations arise in your experience to either make you aware of your strengths or to inspire you to walk in a new direction. Today’s trials are destined to be tomorrow’s enlightenments. stretch,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], belong and nurture relationships. “You’re not making any sense!” A mother bemoans to her teenage daughter “We never spend any time together You’re always out with your friends” The daughter snickers as she walks out the door “Yeah well at least I have a life” The CEO sits at his desk and stares down the VP of Sales “You’re not hitting your numbers You’ve got one more month or else” To which the VP of Sales retorts “If you’d stop burdening me with customer service issues I’d have time to make my calls” It’s easy to empathize with the tension finger-pointing and emotion in these examples They are all-too-common instances that occur when two people in a relationship get stuck in their communication Several years ago I was taught a method to clear any issue I’m having with my important relationships This method helps prevent and shift relationships stuck in pain suffering and misunderstanding into ones that revel in ease joy and empathy Since first learning this approach I’ve field-tested it in a wide range of circumstances including:
• Preventing arguments and enhancing intimacy with my lover
• Improving communication with my eight year-old daughter
• Clearing issues with my business partner
• Facilitating a group of CEOs
I can say that the method works in all of these circumstances and often remarkably well so I thought you might benefit by learning it too
What It Is
A mentor of mine Jim Warner of On Course International created the method called the Issues Clearing Model It provides a structured format to clear just about any issue In my own view the Issues Clearing Model is designed to accomplish two things: help you be responsible in your communication and help you reflect emotion rather than negotiate with emotion
I’ll explain more about both of these items – Responsibility and Reflection – in a bit but before you read any further download and print two copies of the Issues Clearing Model ( and use it to follow along It’s a good idea to print two copies because you’ll want to practice the Issues Clearing Model with someone and you’ll need a cheat sheet at first to guide you through the process
How to Use It
The Issues Clearing Model is one of those things that seem challenging at first and get easy after a few tries Perhaps the biggest challenge is to summon the initial courage to communicate in a new way As you’ll see when you try it that it’s worth it
The Issues Clearing Model is designed to be used by both people in the relationship The person with the issue starts and states the facts their story feelings and responsibilities and what they specificaly want to have occur The other person listens and then reflects back to ensure mutual understanding At the end if needed the parties can switch roles and the person who brought the issue forward now listens and reflects back
Although the process is designed to be used by two people I’ve also found it an effective practice even if the other person isn’t comfortable participating with me That is I use it to structure my own communication The other person is usually better able to hear me and tends to respond more openly and receptively even without reciprocating the exercise
For example my eight year-old daughter isn’t at an age where she can comfortably engage in reflection But when I express my issues in an appropriate way using the first part of the Issues Clearing Model we both still benefit Why I’m speaking in a Responsible way and I’m appropriately Reflecting my own emotions without blaming or shaming or “shoulding” her
In the same vein your boss may not have the desire to engage in a structured two-way communication (in fact he may be less mature than Alexa my eight year-old) But don’t let the notion of “my boss or my wife would never agree to this” stop you from taking responsibility for your own communication You’ll be surprised at how the other responds and as they get more comfortable they may be open to participating as well
Why Use It
We all want to experience harmonious relationships with those closest to us – our mates parents relatives siblings children friends and our colleagues at work But more often than not just like the examples above poor communication can derail our closest relationships
You are an effective communicator when you tend to always follow two simple rules in your communication: 1) You are Responsible in your communication
2) You Reflect emotion and never negotiate with emotion When you follow these two rules Responsibility and Reflection your communication with those closest to you naturally improves as well You can help prevent issues from emerging and have the power to clear them when they do emerge
To be Responsible means that you take ownership for the issue and your reaction to it You speak in unarguable truths and “I” statements Not in unclear truths and “You” statements that make the other person feel blamed shamed and misunderstood
To be Reflective means that you honor the other’s right to feel what he or she is really feeling To be Reflective also means reflecting on your own emotions the story you’re creating your own part in the issue and what positive specific outcome you desire
Negotiating with emotions on the other hand implies that whatever you or someone else are feeling is not acceptable To negotiate with emotions is a bad practice all around It causes pain and suffering and builds a brittle wall in your relationships To be Reflective with emotions means that you honor and acknowledge what you and the other person are feeling but you don’t take on their emotions as your own nor do you try to get the other person to stop feeling their emotions You just reflect them
Reflecting emotions rather than negotiating them is also a recognition of responsibility Who is ultimately responsible for what you are feeling You are Who is ultimately responsible for what others are feeling They are
Often we negotiate with emotion in others because it’s too hard to deal with it in ourselves For example for a long time if the woman in my life was feeling down or depressed I would feel responsible and try to “fix” it If I couldn’t fix it I’d start to feel like I was failing and so I’d withdraw into myself This resulted in her feeling more depressed and soon led to a vicious cycle where both of us felt hurt and abandoned by the other
As I became more aware I realized that I’m not at all responsible for how someone else is feeling At the same time I am 100% responsible for my own feelings Just because my woman is feeling down doesn’t mean I’m failing as a partner right It’s always obvious in hindsight And that rather than fixing a problem I am a better partner by simply hearing her empathizing and accepting what she is feeling
So don’t negotiate with someone’s emotions When you do it contributes to the other person’s feeling misunderstood dismissed or belittled in relationship to you Instead be Responsible and Reflective
When to Use It
As a general rule of thumb use this model any time you’re feeling negative emotions or judgments arise or believe they might arise When you notice a rise in negative emotions occurring stop the conversation and start the Issues Clearing Model If you’re dealing with a very emotionally charged issue you’ll want to work with a coach facilitator or therapist
Do use it when you’re giving constructive feedback and advice It’s a powerful way to consciously separate yourself from what’s a fact and what’s a story It also encourages you to examine your own part and get clear about what it is you really want the other person to change or do differently When you give feedback or advice in this responsible and reflective way you’ll find that other people are much more receptive rather than defensive
When Not to Use It
Don’t use the Issue Clearing Model when the other person has no interest in being in a harmonious relationship with you Relationships are a two-way street – if yours is only one-way do yourself a favor and let the relationship go gracefully However often we can perceive that someone has zero interest in being in a harmonious relationship with us when in actuality that person is feeling shut down and hurt because we have been negotiating with their emotions rather than reflecting them So give the Issues Clearing Model a real try before deciding what to do with your relationships
Don’t use the Issue Clearing Model when you’re in a crisis or under tremendous time pressure It’s not something you just speed through rip off and be done with it You need to be in a space to really hear and empathize with yourself and the other person Come back to the Issues Clearing Model when you have more time
Summary
Relationships can be a source of great joy laughter and ease They can also be a great pain in the neck and rife with fear frustration and loneliness If you want to have safe harmonious and productive relationships at home and work you need to do two things: Always speak Responsibly and always Reflect emotion It takes some courage and practice to become proficient with the Issues Clearing Model but once you make the commitment you’ll have access to a simple way to create happier easier and more productive relationships all around you Author's Bio: see and feel yourself achieving it,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Find other things to do than watch television. making a bigger effort to Care/Love
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but exciting is, has arrived at the meeting of the American Secretary of state Hilary said,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], to two and two when the United States will be launched in 2000 and other rich countries to provide $one hundred billion to fight climate change, for poor countries, but the premise is to reach a global climate treaty.
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earlier proposed EU funded poor year $eleven billion plan, Japan said the next three years will provide nineteen billion five hundred million dollars to poor countries, conditions are to be agreed.
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Bakhtiari accepted the morning Yonhap news coverage in the Iran Embassy in Seoul, made the above remarks. He also said, "reciprocity can be applied to any bilateral relationship."

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While sounding like a child or teenager can be disheartening, the good news is that you have a better, more mature-sounding voice inside. When you learn to place your voice in your chest, you will discover a resonant,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], warm sound that is ageless.
If you are plagued with a voice that sounds like a teenager (or even younger), have you ever considered a course in voice improvement? Sounding like a teen or preteen when you are 21 is one thing – sounding young or childish when you are over 21 and possibly looking for a job or a promotion is an entirely different ball game however.
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Don’t put up with a childlike sound any longer. When you discover your ‘real’ voice,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I guarantee that others will look upon you with a new-found respect and you will feel much better about yourself!
There are many, many benefits of voice training that are indeed to numerous to list in one article; but,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], when you discover your ‘real’ voice, you will actually enjoy hearing yourself on your answering machine or voicemail.
While men can sound too young,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is much more common to find this problem with women’s voices. The reasons are varied as to why this happens. You may be imitating your mother who also sounds too young or you may have been abused as a child and kept the childlike voice as a means of protection. It is even possible that your mother was an ogre and you subconsciously kept your young voice so as not to sound like her.
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The official guide to Public Speaking See all Articles by Nancy DanielsSee Nancy Daniels's Expert PageGet Updates on Public SpeakingGet Updates on Nancy Daniels Average: 3 Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote) Tweet
When I started my business,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], one of my very first clients sounded like a 6-year-old when I met her. She was in her 30’s and studying to be a doctor. When I asked her if she sounded like her mother, she responded that she and her sister were abused by their mother. Both women retained their childlike voice so as not to sound like their mother – the witch.
Another marvelous benefit of good voice training is that you will be able to increase your volume without shouting. This is good news for your throat as well as your listener’s ears!
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Seo said the aim of the billboard ad is to counter China's attempt to register the tune as part of Chinese cultural heritage. The clip will be aired 1,500 times a month and the cost was paid for by Gyeonggi Province, Suwon City, and Gyeonggi Arts Center.

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The first nuclear power plant accident 3 units within 4 days after the release of 2% iodine
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social commentary in the Hongkong in April 15 / Xinhua METI nuclear safety security institute,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], said the 14 day,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the first nuclear power plant in Fukushima Tokyo Electric Power after the accident about 4 days time, radioactive uranium fission generated in at least 2% radionuclide iodine is released to the outside.
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the reactor containment pressure drop,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the East power through the release of radioactive material to the outside "steam exhaust pressure reduction" operation,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is estimated at 100 hours after the accident,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], a total of radionuclide cesium radionuclides iodine 130000 Beck and 6100's Beck was released, respectively,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], equivalent to the total 2.1% and 0.9%.
reactor also contains other nuclear fission products,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Security Institute continues to release quantity analysis.
related topics: japan earthquake, Fukushima nuclear crisis
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Bakhtiari accepted the morning Yonhap news coverage in the Iran Embassy in Seoul, made the above remarks. He also said, "reciprocity can be applied to any bilateral relationship."

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Southern rural news recently to promote the Gaozhou City People's hospital medical model as a breakthrough, make people see on the disease, can afford to see a doctor, see a good disease.

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Nanfang rural news,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], China Banking Regulatory Commission vice chairman Jiang Dingzhi said recently held in here the "China County Economic Development Forum",[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is expected by the end of 2010, the national banking financial institutions,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the service network can reach 13 or so, about the national banking financial institutions, network 2/3; the loan balance of 12.3 yuan,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the national financial institutions loans accounted for more than 25%.
the people's Bank of China President Assistant Jin Qi said, "eleven five" period,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], fiscal and finance combines agriculture policy system gradually formed,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], from 2003 to 2009 a total reduction of rural credit cooperatives tax 76000000000 yuan. In addition,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in recent years the central through special paper, special loan,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], hedging,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], to subsidize interest, tax policy support,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], to provide financial support to rural credit cooperatives more than 260000000000 yuan. Feng Lei.
Southern Rural News revealed that the China Banking Regulatory Commission Vice Chairman Jiang Dingzhi recently held in the county economy in China Development Forum,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is expected by the end of 2010, the national banking financial institutions, the service network can reach 13 or so, accounting for about 23 of banking financial institutions network; the loan balance of 12.3 yuan, the in the national financial institutions loans accounted for more than 25%. The people's Bank of China President Assistant Jin Qi said, during the period of eleven five, fiscal and financial combination of supporting policy system gradually formed,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], from 2003 to 2009 a total reduction of rural credit cooperatives tax...
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Southern rural news recently to promote the Gaozhou City People's hospital medical model as a breakthrough, make people see on the disease, can afford to see a doctor, see a good disease.

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Skype plans to launch a computer to phone service in China
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; EBay's Internet phone company Skype is optimistic that,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it talks with China's state-owned telecom operators, is in China the world's most populous telecoms market, launched the computer to phone calls (computer-to-telephone) pave the way.
the British "Financial Times" reported, outside there is a saying that,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Usa Inc Verso Technologies is close to selling a Skype filter system, to one of China's leading operator Skype CEO Nicholas Strom (Niklas Zennströ m) in an interview to ignore. Skype in China to offer free computer to computer communication service,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but due to regulatory constraints, there is no direct marketing it paid SkypeOut computer to phone service.
he declined to predict when the Skype will be launching the SkypeOut. SkypeOut allows users to call to all over the world, but the price is only a fraction of the cost of traditional operators. However, his comments are the most direct response so far on Skype Verso announced last week that content. The Verso headquarters in Atlanta in the United States claims,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is promoting a ban on Skype system to a Chinese "the first echelon operators", Verso did not specify which operators. Verso announced that the content has aroused speculation,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the Chinese state-owned operators to ban internet protocol based voice (VOIP) technology on telephone services, such as Skype service. But Mr Strom said, Skype did not find the Chinese operators are used or review of Verso products, he also suggested that, the Usa Inc to play a "brilliant PR trick". He added: "I think they are not actually such products. I think it's closer to PowerPoint,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], press releases, or 'steam' (vapourware) or something."
Verso insists it is,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], which has a large China telecom operators test blocked Skype technology. The vice president of Verso sales director John o. Riley (John O'Reilly) said,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], because people on the Internet telephone service security concerns, China and other regions in the presence of Skype reasonable requirements of filtering technology. One problem with the Skype negotiations with Chinese operators to meet, is monitoring the Internet telephone very difficult. Chinese authorities often wiretapping of telephone >相关的主题文章：

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music hall has strict rules on past performances, held only classical concerts, this is in the Royal under the coordination of 007 special exception, allowing for more building premiere stage in the periphery.